Author Archives: troutboy

Trump Has Trouble With Putin’s Handwriting on First Day in Office.

(Washington, D.C.) Donald Trump’s first day as President got off to a slow start when “The Donald” had trouble reading Vladimir Putin’s handwritten instructions. “What the hell is this?”  he was heard to mutter.   “He couldn’t just send me tweets.  … Continue reading

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North Korea Admits “Secret Crush” on U.S.

(Pyongyang, North Korea) Rogue state North Korea admitted today of a “secret crush” on its long time adversary, the United States. “Yes, it’s true,” It said, hanging its head. I could never it admit it before, even to myself. But … Continue reading

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Boehner Tells America to “F*** Itself”

(Washington, D.C.) It has been reported that in the middle of negotiations to avoid the “fiscial cliff,” Speaker of the House John Boehner pointed at Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid and exclaimed “Go Fuck Yourself!” after Harry Reid had characterized … Continue reading

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Texas Arms All Nursery School Students

(Austin, TX) Expanding upon the “Guardian Program” in Wilbarger county that arms teachers, The State of Texas has now mandated training and arming all nursery school students. “So far the program has been very successful,” Explains Wil “Wild Bill” Wilkersen, … Continue reading

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Honey Boo Boo is CNN’s “Most Intriguing of 2012”

(Atlanta, GA) CNN.com surprised the journalistic world today by designating child beauty pagaent star Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson the Most Intriguing Person of 2012, edging out North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. The only other newsworthy figures were Trayvon … Continue reading

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