(Pyongyang, North Korea) Rogue state North Korea admitted today of a “secret crush” on its long time adversary, the United States.
“Yes, it’s true,” It said, hanging its head. I could never it admit it before, even to myself. But my feelings are too great.”
“It’s like sooo obvious,” said close friend and neighbor, China. “Everybody knows it. North Korea keeps pretending to be like ‘I hate the U.S., the U.S., I’m going to bomb them’ but I saw it the other day, it kept Googling everything about it, checking out its Facebook page and tweets…c’mon!”
North Korea’s Manhood Rises
“I know, right?” chimed in South Korea. “Any time a country says they hate another country that much, you know it’s secretly got the hots for it. And the fact that it’s not supposed to like [the U.S.] makes it, like, the forbidden fruit or something. What’s with the long range missiles it’s threatening to fire at Washington? Riddle-me-that, Batman!”
